1:29am

Renewing of fate,

I don't want to be frustrated anymore, because life is too short for regrets and too short for disappointments. I ask to be able to go through everyday with no complaints and no so called nightmares. Should I continue with how things are, I'd be perpetually trapped in a cycle of elaborate guild of what ifs. So starting today, I hope I can finally resolve the issues that linger and be able to confront my insecurities and uncertainties to be able to come terms of actually living my life.

I don't know who I am in this,

Statistically speaking, unless you are a total hermit, a social retard, or ugly as a putrid bum, there is at least one person in your multiply network that has a crush on you, wants to date you, wants to sleep with you, or simply just wants to kiss you.

So... let's play "No Guts, No Glory!"

The rules are simple.

1. If you want to date the person who posted this, send a Personal Message, not a reply to this post, saying "Coffee?"
2. If you have a crush on the person who posted this, send a Personal Message saying "You're hot!"
   
3. If you just want to sleep with them & stay friends, send them a message that says "Nice shoes!"
4. If you simply just wants to kiss the person who posted this, send a Personal Message saying, "I do!"
   

SCARED?

The only rule is that, you must not make anyone who sends you a personal message feel stupid for feeling that way about you. Acknowledge. Say thank you. Move on.

IF YOU'VE READ THIS, YOU HAVE TO REPOST THIS, EVEN IF YOU'RE TAKEN & see who replies.

SO... re-post this as "No Guts, No Glory", as it doesn't matter if you're married, in a relationship, or single. You opened it so you HAVE to repost it! A test of your bravery...

C'mon! No Guts, No Glory! :D

Hayayay...

I've been sick for the past few days and missed a whole lot of things. Well maybe something good came out of it... I guess. At least now, I can say that I know what happens when I do something I'm not used to doing or when I do something I don't really do/want to do. Lesson learned.

Hopefully I get better soon. I need all my strength for the last leg of school. I need every ounce of everything to graduate this April. Lord. Help me.:)

I've been on this Earth for almost 21 years now. I've live a life full of twists and turns, glitches here and there, which were arrived at consciously each time. Most of my decisions are carefully calculated, but some (mostly major ones) are just chosen out of convenience.

Now why do I say out of convenience? Due to social constraints and what have you, I've chosen a lot of things by mere convenience to fit in. I know I've to face the consequences of my decisions, especially the right ones, but everything is just framed so neatly in the context of society and what is considered acceptable.

Now why go against it?

Now I'm faced with another of life's decisions, THIS or THAT?

Have you ever heard phrases of any color analogy? Like "Pink is the new black", "You seem blue today" or anything to that effect. Colors are given arbitrary meaning as to how it has been used in a given context.

With respect to colors, one household appliance that never originally had color is the television or the telly. Before the colored units were born, the black & white thrived in homes all over. Owning a black & white tv back then meant wealth and privilege. Ever rich family then had one as a status symbol. Having more than one was just too much of a luxury.

Well, in our house we exactly have 5 television sets. One of which stands out, because it's the biggest, but also has a problem holding colors together. The tv changes from ranges of different hues ever now and then, so the desired colors aren't really shown that often. Even if this is the case, we still use it with no complaints. So even if the "trueness" of color isn't displayed, we are still content with it.

Colors play an amazing role in how we put things into perspective. I sometimes think that color just eludes us from how plain and dull life really is.

The question that I would always pose to myself is "When will I see life in a different light/hue?" or "When will I transgress the world of B&W?"

How about your world?:)

You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained

The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning. Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.   The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

Your Brain is 66.67% Female, 33.33% Male

Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!

I really like what is in the data, but the percentage shows something else. Are females smarter than males!? And they also say that females tend to talk of more important stuff than males. Should I be thankful for the results of the quiz?! You tell me...ü

6/24/2005

 

Sad day. First class, we had a semi-surprise quiz (Semi because it was unannounced although we kinda got the hint when she gave us our reading assignment). Guess what I got over 10?! I only got a 1! Waaaah! What a nice way to start the day! Hmph! I have a reason why I wasn’t prepared for the quiz. Reason was that half of the reading was in SPANISH! Hello!? So I thought she’d explain it to us first, before she would give us a quiz. BUT NO! What can we do!? We are in college, remember?!(Talking to myself.)  That was not the end of it, next class, we also had a quiz. This one was a bit harder, but I was able to prepare, kinda. Still don’t know the results, but I have a hunch that I got a passing grade(THANK GOD! Hehe!ü). Last class, my professor was a no show.

 

After school, I went straight to the mall--Glorieta. I was planning to stalk a bunch of my friends. (I was stalking them because I was uninvited to join them.) This was what made the day doubly sad. My friends were at the mall, because one of our friends celebrated her birthday last June 22(different person from last entry, obviously!). This was her birthday blow out (I dunno if she treated them. Let us just say that she did.) Days before, people where asking me if I was going to Glorieta on Friday, which was today. I was like, “Why!? Anything happening there?!” They all just said, “Was just asking.”  What really made my heart break was the fact that they had to hide it from me. I can accept the fact that I was not invited. I was not the kind of person who would force people to include me in something or invite me, for that matter, to go somewhere, especially, if they didn’t want me there. People are you getting my point?! To make it short, I was pissed off not because I was not invited, but because they were hiding it from me and had to resort to lying just to keep it secret. I had my times when people had plans and they were all talking about it in front of me and I didn’t give a damn. At least they made it clear that I was not part of it or that they didn’t want me there.

 

Well, I still thank God for such a wonderful, learning day. I learned that for every reading assignment in one of my classes that we would automatically have a quiz the following meeting. Most important lesson: People are not really what they seem, so be careful.

 

NOTE: The people mentioned are still my friends, but I look at them differently now.

 

Another small bit about me, but I hope I lose this trait, I am a person who will remember a person’s wrongs, especially, the ones done to me.

6/19/2005

 

It is Sunday once again… Last day of freedom from all the school work that was waiting just a few hours away. Although I would be waking up a little bit later than usual because my professor for the first class will be out for a week and a half, I would rather stay at home and do the usual watch television and go online the whole day. Haaay! College life rocks, yet it also sucks!

It was an unusual Sunday for me. We went to the earliest church service, which only happens when have plans for the later services. Good thing we did attend the first service, because I had places to go and people to see. (Cliché ba toh?!)

 

First on my list of places to go was SMB(SM Bicutan). I was to meet up with some high school friends to buy a birthday present for another high school friend who was turning 18. When the three of us met up, we thought of buying our friend a book entitled, “When God Writes Your Love Story”, but the bookstore run out of copies. Then one of my friends suggested that we go to a boutique to buy her make-up or perfume, something really girly. Hehe! So we finally decided on a set of bath necessities and something to make your feet looking fine (I don’t know if this adjective properly describes the foot after you’ve used the foot treatment). So we headed to my old high school friend’s church for her small advance birthday celebration(Her birthday is really on the 22th). YAHOO! She is going to be of legal age. Haha! Although the crowd of the party was of minimal size, we had a small program, something like the ones done in debuts. I was part of the 18 roses, but we didn’t do the usual 18 roses’ dance. We were to say our wishes for the birthday celebrant or something of the like(I wasn’t really paying attention, because I was worrying about my next appointment. I thought I was running late).  I said something that was a bit relevant, yet it didn’t show the depth of the friendship we had. Well, that’s done.

 

Next and last on my list was to go to another mall—Glorieta. I was going to meet up with another set of high school friends and our friends from another high school for a despidida for friends leaving for Canada on the 22th. I arrived at Glorieta around 2:30pm to 2:40pm. I stayed in the car for about 30 minutes trying to call the people who planned the whole thing, but no one was answering their freaking phones! My gosh! That really pisses me off. (Imagine if you attempted calling a bunch of people, but not even one of them answered!?) After all the aggravating dialing, I messaged one of them that I was pissed off because no one answered my call, and asked where they plan to meet. Finally, I left the car because a meeting place was secured, so I thought. When I entered the mall, I received a message changing the meeting place. The message was really confusing because it mentioned of a place that was alien and yet familiar to me. So I went around looking for them. After 20-30 minutes of walking aimlessly around the mall(Coz I was not really sure bout the place), I finally found them. Another hour, all of us were all together. I wouldn’t go on with the details of our despidada. All of it was all fun and memories that each of us would surely keep. At around 10pm, we, the north and south people, parted ways. I gave the south people a ride down south and the north people started their long commute up north. (Repetitive use of adjective, don’t you think?!) (Till next time, Norte People!ü)

 

That ended the night for most of them. As for me and my friends whom the despidida was for, we felt the night was too young and a lot can still be done. So we headed to their place to have our last time of “bonding”. Garsh, it feels so sad thinking that they would be living in a few days, but I know God has a wonderful plan for them there.

 

11:15pm, I left their place. On my drive home, I remembered that I should pray for them. I thought of every possible prayer for the whole family. At some point while I was praying, I got struck with a question. Why do we mention by detail the things that we want God to do for us, but at the end we still say that ‘God’s will be done’?! So why not just pray that God’s will be done and not present all our requests and dilemmas, but soon enough, I remembered a devotion I had in High School that answered my question. As our father, God wants us to ask for what we want and need, and we should realize that everything is in His control and has the right answer for our pleas. He may answer us with a “yes” because it is according to His plan, he may answer us with a “no” for He has something better planned for us, or maybe a “wait” because it is too early.

 

You should always remember to trust God’s heart!ü

6/18/2005

 

(Note: Technically this is not my first blog entry. My first one got thrown out by my dial-up connection. KAINIS!)

 

Another day with nothing productive to do at home, but watch TV and go online. I guess… it beats going to school and doing research papers and the like.

 

I started the day by first going to the doctor and going to the  barber shop to have my hair cut done. Whew! That felt lighter. Hehe! When I got home, I took a bath to get all the left over hair out of my head. While I was taking a bath, I listened to the old songs I had in the PC and sang along. I was wondering if the neighbors got irritated with my singing, especially, when I get the urge to take a bath in the wee hours of the morning. Haha! Poor neighbors. Well, they should live with that. Not my fault they bought a lot beside ours. BEHLAT!

 

An hour after that, I brought my mom to her Bible Study. Then I dropped off a book at a friend's house. (He was my batch mate in high school. Grabe! I miss all my high school friends.) After my walk in memory lane, I went straight home. When I got home, I started my usual weekend TV marathon. Going through my favorite channels, I stopped at STAR MOVIES. It was playing one of my favorite true stories—Patch Adams.  Although the movie was already in the middle, I didn’t miss the best parts. The protagonist in the movie is Hunter Patch Adams. In the beginning of the movie, he encounters the worst trial in his life that he thinks of committing suicide. While still sane, he admits himself in a mental institution. In the asylum, he meets a man that inspires him to go through with his life and get into a medical career. Just watch the movie, you might get the inspiration to get in a medical profession too.

 

Line for the day: “To improve the quality of life.” According to the movie, we are all doctors if we improve the quality of life. A simple way of improving the quality of life is by sharing a smile to a stranger, a “hello” to a friend, and a helping hand to someone who seems to need it. You might not know that was what he/she needed to forget all the troubles of the day.ü